This is my second post for the day, as yesterday was lost to work and Kylie.

I have just got back to work after a funeral this morning. My girlfriend’s mother died last Thursday after a reasonably quick fight (March – June) with the Big C.

Having lost my mother 2.5 years ago, I see funerals a bit differently now. I listened carefully to the celebrant’s words, and wondered if they truly conveyed the family’s intent in thinking about the one they have lost. How can someone who has met you and talked to you for about an hour truly capture the spirit of one they have never met. A celebrant does the best that he/she can, but it never quite gets there.

During the service I was fine. I feel the tragedy for my friend but the loss is not mine. Yet when I saw her walking down the aisle after the committal, with her older son beside her, both in tears, my throat twisted in pain.

The loss of a mother is devastating, no matter the relationship you shared in life.

I miss my mum. I still have lots of moments when I think ‘Mum would know that’, or ‘Mum would get a laugh out of that’. Even though my mum was lost years earlier to Alzheimer’s, I was devastated when she finally passed.

So, Mum – I ‘m always thinking of you. And I love you.


One thought on “Loss

  1. My Dad didn’t like the way the celebrant described his mother (my Nan) at her funeral – he thought it sounded sugar coated. So we decided not to have any speakers at his funeral (also about 2.5 years ago). Instead we used a slideshow of photos set to music, and asked the attendees to think about him and what he was like using the photos and their own memories. I think he would have liked that.

    Your final paragraphs made me tear up – in memory of those who I have lost, and in empathy for your loss and your friend’s loss. Hugs to you.

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